ANXIETY

ANXIETY

Feeling Some kind of way

Some may say I'm overreacting

But thoughts are leaking to my heart

Feeling like: Is this the wrong thing to say?

If I speak the truth will you walk away?

I can't help but speak my thoughts, and know you will get angry

Feeling anxiety that this is how it must be

Have to sit for a second and catch my being

Feeling like it's hard for me to breath

This is deeper then you and me

 Suicidal Feeling

Going to create something so my juices are flowing

Maybe I relate to the suicidal feeling...free of the mind and flying with the body.

Painted elephants on my arm as a sign of my luck

Born to live free and will die everyday living free!

Wanted by many had by few


Taste of grape fruit

Knowledge starting from the tree root

You're stuck on stupid like a car boot

Pretty on the outside
But the uglyness clouds her brain
She is brillantly insane

"She Smiles"

Nobody really knows in her mind what dwells

The thoughts that go through her mind are like a spell

I wear my heart on my sleeve, but I change colors as quick as the leaves.

Love you hard once, Shame on you; love you hard twice shame on me.

My hearts's building up a fee, my love is nolonger free.

One way streets I am inclined to drive through until I find a two way street.

I'm not looking for my other half, I'm looking for my other whole.

That type of love that will mend my soul.

Quoting" fuck love" cuz she's no longer here

The Innocent Eyes of Children...

While watching a movie with my two year old niece, she says to me, "Look at the Earth Blue, it's so beautiful!"

Simple things like that is what I work on living for.  So young, but they view life in such a beautiful way.

The first time they touch a flower it's the feeling of new life.  The first time they taste their favorite food, their taste buds start to dance.

The first time they see an airplane, they stare up at the sky with the widest eyes.  The birds, "but mommy how does it fly?" inquiring minds.

I can touch, feel, walk is something that excites them.

My two year old godson was crying.  My niece proceeded to grab a tissue and ask him why he was so sad while wiping his tears and telling him, "it's ok, don't be sad."  They hardly speak but know how to communicate.  How is it that two and three year olds know how to communicate so well and adults lack that skill?

They touch, feel and speak sometimes without words.

I know as we get older we all learn different life lessons, but that should not take away from the simple things in life we learn.

"Use to remember"

                                                                "Use to remember"

I use to love him, now I only have a vague memory of him.

He made me smile once upon a time, but now I hardly remember him.

You came along in my life, and things became so simple

Sitting in the backyard looking at the stars, now I can remember

Thought it was love but it was sometime in December

Every time he would threaten to leave I would play Gone ‘til November

Good or bad he was someone I use to remember

Kissing your lips made me feel a tremble,

And you replaced the man I use to remember

Good or bad he was someone I use to remember

He doesn’t  just  want to have sex with me but he wants to lay with me

Why is this feeling foreign to me?

Used to men that don’t speak but he wants to get to know me

He makes me angry he makes me cry

He makes me happy he makes me smile

This is the joy of loving someone from your insides

I’m not sure what it is and I like it

Makes me lose all train of thought and I like it

Got me feeling all jumbled inside and I like it

You take me out of my comfort zone and I like it

...I Like It...

"Thinking Out Loud"

I know you might not respond and I might not either
burning through each other's souls like ether
but we both listen to the other maybe thinking about the other
sometimes wondering about the other
with that in mind we go far holding that other person to heart
could be seas apart but I still come through
two, three years still ride for you
unspoken ryders moving in life like spiders
we know we belong but create our own webs
catch it in your net life isn't all set
like a glove your love felt like seeing a blue dove
no commas no marks just my rambling thoughts
making his song cry I don't do revenge
I go on a loving life binge
yeah, some may cringe but at the end of the day I am ok
it's the first time of life when I realized I was able to let go
toe to toe bring your words
sounds like endless slurs
butterfly traps take off caps
the honey bee I don't wear yellow
you will not sting me ...
He treated me like a soldier,
because I come off hard as a rock swinging like a bolder
You're not allowed to cry that's what you told yourself

I can't say I don't when I do

When your mind's telling you not to care ,
but your heart is beating so loud it drowns the thought out...
just thinking out loud........