Quote of the month

                   Standing like an imprint on the wall 

 Push Hard never watch me fall

Standing like an imprint on the wall 

Push hard never watch me fall 

Love Lost

I saw my first love in passing

He Smiled

I Smiled


His Smile was like the Boston Skyline

When I looked into his eyes, it was like counting stars

Trying to connect the dots


All the while we never had a moment to apologize

Life passed us both by

The glance he gave knowing he was my soulmate from another lifetime

I could never say how sorry and happy I was

Looking back we didn't have a clue


For a brief moment we stood in silence

I apologized, he apologized

without even saying a word

You will always be my first love so no love lost

As we both walked on by

the only thought I want to be left of you is that Smile

Many Hearts

They say it takes a village to raise a child

So many hands have carried you until you became an adult, my child

Your mother, Your father

Aunts and uncles

You had the privellage to grow up in a village

The stories that were told to you

Became written in stone for you

We all fight against our  own current 

With the help of a village you returned back to shore

From wiping you tears

and letting you know you can be more then your fears

From lessons in school to lessons from the old school

Everyone in your life played a part

You are a symbol of many hearts

The village raised you

They can now praise you

You can look back on this wealth

And  now you know how to help those that come after you

The village that raised me helped me raise you

Quote of the month

If silence is golden I've already said to much.I don't respond to nonsense I let you respond to yourself.

Quote of the month

" Sadness sometimes shows you the light of happiness. In the mist of tears I stopped and smiled at the thought of you"

Speaking in Silence

 I keep certain thoughts to myself no need to waste my breath I just put my thoughts into writing

Everybody wants you to listen

But you are not allowed to speak

That is when you must make a choice 

Will you listen up when I speak in silence?!

The day you call looking for guidance

Sorry I lost my voice on those long drawn out phone calls

When I listened and you spoke

Over and over couldn't get in a word

I started learning how to drop those calls

Pressing nothing but ignore

If I disappeared would you even notice?!

That wasn't a question

I will not change who I am and will continue to lend an ear when needed 

 but will also let my voice be heard when needed

This is when I will be considered a B

But the world has room for much more than you and me

Thank you for opening my eyes and closing my ears so I can see


How does it feel to be left holding the receiver?!

Release

When something consumes your mind they call that insanity

It's dirtier than profanity

Repeating the same thought a million times

Take a number wait in line

Learning meditation until you release the feeling

Breathing in and out release the feeling

Thoughts not only consume your mind they start to consume your body

Trying something new had my taste buds dancing and my mind became open
and more enchanted

By the time I was done breathing it felt like such a release

One breath, two breaths then the final release

The thought in repeat had left my mind until it was no longer a memory.

Tears of Gold

Listening to heart and soul

If I could write my tears would be gold

My paper would be soaked I would flood your computer screen

You couldn't even pretend to know

What I was told and what was seen

I've only broke down in front of a selected few

  

Instead of crying in front of the world

I tell my story in hopes it will help at least one girl

Not ashamed of my past but hope it will help your future

Not trying to be a preacher but a teacher from my mistakes

The last year has been a whirlwind

I thank God for allowing me in

I finally realized how to let him in

He blessed me with this skill for a reason

I will use it for all my seasons  

They call it writers block

Nothing I dislike more than writer's block

Means it's time to cut out some of the flock

I write one line

I erase two lines

I post and unpost

So far this is what I have today

How do you have so much and so little to say?

Time to take a long walk blasting that Jill Scott

 Music improves my thoughts

While taking a long walk

Realized I wasn't born to stay silent

I was born to make a sound

If I'm quiet it's an explosion in my mind

I have enough to say

I will cotinue to fill your news page

While feeding your brain

They called it writer's block

I call it having a long thought

Clear as day

Acting like I don't have any feelings for you is clear as day. You see right through me and that's how I know you are him. My Mr. Right has always been under my nose but he doesn't even know ...is it better to stay friends?  That's what "they" say.  If it's not me and you until the end, will we still remain friends?  Love and friendship is a thin line but I want to try this time  ..he knows who he is, I underestimated him, he is just waiting for me to say: you are what I need. Having my words stuck on the tip of my lips. I look into his eyes and I start to renege this. What do I say? What do I do? Stuck on one line, trying to make it ryhme. But there is no rhyme or reason, want to grasp this before the change of the season.

The words slowly started dripping from the tip of my lips. My legs nervoulsy started to twitch.. If you like me and I like you let's take a walk into each others hearts. Me and you feels like one of a kind. They say this feeling comes once in a lifetime.

He said let my mind taste this. Let me take the words right from your lips. I've been also feeling this. I've been trying to act like all I wanted was your friendship, but I want a relationship. "So Beautiful" playing in the background.. It became the sweetest sound......

History

                                                History

We have so much history

We grew up together

Now we hardly speak to each other

We use to jump the fence with each other

Now we are standing on the other side of the fence barely looking at each other

Your mother was like my mother

Now we don't even know one another

I never thought I would be looking through the looking glass

We have, had so much history now shake hands with my past

This time has come to pass

I can't say you are not missed

But I can't say I regret this

Some may think it's cold for letting go

But only me and you know

Knowing someone since you were a few years old

Does not mean you two will grow old

Always think of you but made an art form of letting go

Love/Hate Game

                      Love/ Hate Game


You love me I love you not

Who would have thought

After all these times I let you go

It don't feel the same

He don't feel the same

She don't feel the same

What a shame!

Naw, I call it the crying game

Loves not lost

Just still as a lamp post

I still have a heart

There is no icebox

I want to feel your touch

Kiss my lips while I wind my hips

It's about to get foggy on my page

Whispers in rage

I'm just playing the love hate game

One minute I love you

The other minute you drive me insane

This is the circle of life so hold real tight

Quality Time

Spending quality time

Smelling like doves men cologne

Love the feeling of  us being alone

Rather see you face to face forget the phone

You don't like the jet black

You say color makes me look more vibrant

But I'm still a diamond

The love that I've known use to be lost and gone

Now I just pick up a micro phone

and let them know that you are the only one

No more busy tone

Just the sound of the moan

I write what I feel at the time

Right now I'm at an all time high

No longer on my K. Coles

On my J. Coles

Living free never felt so good

Knows how to be smooth and keep it hood

This type of loving never felt so good

I was, I am , I will be

Every time I write I learn more and more about myself and what type of woman I use to be and will become.  I am a solid woman that has learned to take life with a grain of salt.  Not perfect, but learning through my own eyes this is my  life...

               I WAS...I AM...I WILL BE.                                        

                                      I was the begging woman
                                      I was the stupid woman
                                      I was the I will die without him woman
                                      I was the to independent woman
                                      I was the love is blind woman
                                      I was the it took me to long to love myself woman
       
                                    
                                      I am the brush it off woman
                                      I am the fuck it hands in the air woman
                                      I am a proud woman
                                      Mistakes and all, woman
                                      I was the weak now I am strong woman
                                      I been the broken down woman
                                      I built myself right back up type woman                                         
                                       

                            I am a mother, sister, daughter, all around type woman.
                                  
                                        

Questions

Questions

I write about all of my thoughts but in the same tone afraid to express myself.  How do you know when it's real?!  How do you know when to stop and feel?!  Who is Mr. Right?  All these thoughts run my mind.  What do you do when you don't trust answering these questions yourself?!  I never liked when people touched me.  How weird does that make me?  I thought I was over you but you keep revisiting my mind!  When will I be able to trust again?  When will I be able to let people go?  Why can't I ever make up my mind?  I am creatively inclined so it makes my emotions go to an all-time high.  What, When and Where will all these questions lead me?  This is the point where I have to believe in me!  Only I can answer all these questions that seem to boggle me!

Work in Progress

                                                       "Work in Progress"

I didn't realize I was so lost
To give it all I had came with a cost
Felt like Jack frost melting until the sun came up
Moon down staring at the stars
The light felt a million years apart

The silent stares bickering in my ears
I was once lost but now I'm found
Certain words can be so profound
Like a child without a father
sometimes you feel like why bother?
I don't need applause from the crowd
I just need someone to hear me out
I'm a work in progress so hear me out

From having a child at a young age
From finishing school, to having a good job
From writing a blog
I'm a work in progress so hear me out

"Moving Forward"

                                    Moving Forward

As the tears flow you can see that she has held the world in her soul

The numbing feeling in her toes, she walked miles on the yellow brick road

She stops and looks up at the sign. Which way do I continue to travel?

One sign says new year, new goals

The other sign says continue onto the same road

Listening to the whisper of a much wiser woman she realizes life is too short

She takes one last look back and continues on to the right road

Happiness only comes from  you and what you choose